Showering with my best friend.......

We are ALL in a different place today than we were several yesterdays ago.  I said in my last post I would NOT get into the current events.  

However, 

Blessings surround each of us.  All the time.  Daily even.  But we don't often take the time to stop and notice them.  Or, we take them for granted until the day they are no longer.  I've had a lot of excess time on my hands with the pickleball courts presently off limits.  It's given me some time to do a little self reflection. 

Today, I realized I am truly blessed to have an unbelievably incredible, caring, patient, talented dog groomer.  I've known Christina for ages.  I, at one point, had the privilege to teach her only daughter.  (Yep, talk about feeling old.  That little cutie patootie is now a full grown woman!  When the heck did that happen?)  Sorry, I digress.  

To get back on track; Christina, great groomer. I always appreciated that I could call up, ten minutes later drop off Maggie, and then I'd get a phone call a couple of hours later informing me she was ready for pickup.  Voila ~ a beautifully groomed and manicured dog who smelled fabulous.

During this "downtime" Maggie's hair has grown exponentially.  I reached the point I could not handle her hair obscuring her vision.  She was literally tilting her head at an angle in order to see. Additionally, she was now far from her usual pleasant smelling self.  She had a lingering scent that could be associated along the lines of something one could purchase from the Peppe La' Pew & Friends catalog.  Not to point fingers or noses, I too, during this "downtime", have not always exuded the most pleasant fragrance either.

  

So, what's a girl to do?  That's right, we showered together.  One of us was there willingly, the other, not so much.

To Maggie's credit, she calmed down and did rather well once she realized she could NOT escape from the shower.  She sat patiently while I towel dried her.  She even sat still while I got out the scissors.  However, there was a substantial amount of side eye glances at me.  I can truly state, before today I had  never actually heard a dog groan out loud before.  And even though I used detangling spray on her goldendoodle coat, she wasn't the most pleasant when I ever so gently combed out her matted fur and then blew it semi-dry.  It was when I decided to go a little farther in her fur trimming, maybe even a little overboard, that things got a little spicy.  

Don't judge me, I recently saw a bunch of your social media posts showing old photos of haircuts and bang trims your mothers gave you back in the day.

Needless to say, currently my dog will not have anything to do with me.  Even when I attempted to bribe her with a bone treat.  She went into a self imposed exile.  You know a dog is completely dejected when you watch them walk over and OPEN their own kennel door to walk in and lay down - with their butt facing you.  I'm hopeful her disdain for me passes quickly.

Christina, tonight I raise my glass to you.  I appreciate you more than you'll ever know.  Please put Maggie in your calendar for the first available appointment.  I pray she will be on good terms with me by then. 

In closing, I just read a quote that resonated with me:

If you want to go fast, go alone.

If you want to go far, go together.

     ~ African Proverb ~

I look forward to going far with you....  

Thanks for reading!

Coke Can Man ~

The world, she is a changing.  Seems we're all 
inundated from every direction with regards to politics and Corona Virus, which subsequently has been retitled ~ Covid19.  Two things I promise I shall NOT discuss.  I won't say EVER because, well, ever is too long a time to try to contain or maintain.

What I will talk about today is Coke Can Man.  He's not an urban legend.  He's real.  And I've seen the photo to prove it!  Warning..... you'll see a modified version at the end of the tale.

I truly feel for the youth of today.  Heck, I feel for the middle aged today.  Additionally, I feel for the old today.  I feel for all single woman (and men for that matter as they've shared stories with me too) in any of the aforementioned categories.  (Well, not ALL single women.... there are more than a handful that will see the fiery pits of Hell, but I'm not going to worry about them.  I'll let God handle that.  They know who they are, and He certainly does too.)  Ok, back to the ones that I do care about.......

I feel for you.....  2020 is definitely a DIFFERENT place than it once was.  For all the incredible advances we've had in just the past 35 years, we've definitely taken substantial steps backwards as well ~ specifically within the realm of dating.  

What was once termed the dating pool (where legend had it there were plenty of fish to be found - yes, I realize I'm mixing my metaphors but at least I'm not mixing a cocktail at 8:30 in the morning) is now a dating cesspool (where the faint of heart are afraid to venture for fear of the creepy, slimey, creatures that congregate there).

Case in point ~ Coke Can Man ~ He was found on a dating site.  By all outward appearances, he was an attractive individual.  A grandpa even.  Well groomed.  Articulate.  Educated.  Employed.  Pleasant sense of humor.  No felonies or ankle bracelets.  No bankruptcies.  He was, however, a Harley rider.  Not that it in itself is a problem.  Just not an activity that the woman he was talking to was interested in, nor would she ever be.  It was my understanding that was made extremely clear.  In fact, that was a dealbreaker for them to continue "talking" in a dating sense,  but they decided to remain in the platonic friend zone as they had so many other interests in common.

Fast forward a couple of weeks when a ding on a cell phone indicated a message had been received to the woman from the "platonic friend".  The unwitting female opened the message and was shocked to find a photograph which she had never wanted, wished, or requested.  In fact, she had at one point during their earlier conversations stipulated that was something NO ONE should ever send to her.  It was a full color selfie of his penis positioned next to a coke can so she  could visualize size and dimensions.

With speed and dexterity that surprised herself, she responded only seconds after receiving the poorly thought out photograph with a comment that still astonishes her to this day.  "Ah, so you prefer the mini cans of Coke!"  Needless to say, the texted response to her called her everything but her name.  He determined that her lack of amazement for his photography skills and appendage deemed her: a man hating bitter bitch of a woman with a heart of stone who was going to die an unloved, unwanted hag. 

Thank goodness for some of technologies advances.  Delete.  Block. Gone forever..............  Coke Can Man became dust in the wind.  It will, however, be a lingering memory for all whom have seen, but will never be able to forget.

Happy to be a Fresca Girl